The Lord Has Spoken,
and I Have Heard!!!
My name is Adam Paul Luttrull. I was born on the 29th
of March, 1989 in Evansville, Indiana to a family in the ministry. This is my
testimony of how God has worked in my life, even when I was completely
disconnected from him.
As a child I was extremely familiar with church and religion.
With my father in the ministry, we spent the first several years of my life
moving from region to region as the Assemblies of God moved my dad from church
to church; job to job.
For much of my life I always knew and understood that God
existed, but so much of what was taught to me in church became lost in
translation. To me, the ministry was a profession; my father’s job. I knew and
understood what church and the bible were, but never understood the importance
of them, or how to actually wind these into my life.
The day before my 10th birthday I woke up to my
bedroom full of my family in mourning. I had no idea what was going on. When my
family noticed that they had finally aroused me to awaken, I learned that
during the overnight hours my Grandfather had a heart attack and passed away.
This single moment completely shifted and shaped my next several years.
Over the course of the next several years, more tragedy
struck my family, and this continued to take its toll on my young mind. My
parents divorced, I lost another grandparent, etc. etc. The harder these
struggles became, the further I distanced myself from the thought of God. I had
several hot and cold years from the age of 12 up until recently. I was either
on fire for God, faking it, or too strung out to care, but very rarely ever
honest to anyone, especially myself.
At the very young age of 9 I discovered marijuana, and the
next couple years of tragedy only became a catalyst for the destruction that
came to me. I began to experiment (very quickly) with other drugs and alcohol,
ultimately leading me into a halfway-house and intensive addiction treatment
program by the age of 19.
When I was 14 years old, the lord spoke to me clearly for the
first time, and showed me my calling. Being a drug addicted worldly teen; this
only fueled the fire of my rebellion. The calling that God had given me
terrified me. Who was I to be a man of God? I saw myself as a broken and drug
addicted boy with no hopes of a successful future, so this was the persona that
I adopted and pursued. Little did I know that I would meet a minister in just a
few short months that would directly alter my vision and future.
The ages of 14-19 were an extremely difficult time for me.
During these years God spoke to me strongly and heavily placing conviction in
my heart, and the truth on my mind. For me, this was extremely frustrating. I
tried so hard to drown the voice of god with alcohol and drugs but no bottle or
needle could ever remove the conviction and guilt I felt. I was completely lost
and alone; hopeless and helpless.
The summer of 2009 is when the Lord really began to rein me
in, and I didn’t even know it yet! This was the summer that I began seeing my
(now) wife, Jenifer. Jenifer and I wasted no time, either! We had been dating
for less than a week when we began to live together. After 2 months of dating
we got engaged, and 2 weeks later found out we were due to be parents. Wow! We
had no idea where we were heading now!
Just this year, my wife and I learned of a terrible issue
within the family. We knew that we were about to take on an immensely heavy
load, both literally and emotionally, and we knew that we were going to need
help through this, so we sought counseling with Dusty and Stephanie McCandless.
That very first night we met with them (on a Saturday night)
started like any other. We sat, we talked, and we were getting to the meat of
the issues. Just then, someone walked into the room and interrupted. The lord
had spoken to them and told them to come back to the church and to pray with
whoever was there. This particular person is also the woman that helped me to
find recovery from drug addiction when I was 19, and I had not even seen her
more than a time or two since!
This completely unwound me. This was my defining moment. This
is how God became real! I had absolutely no intention of going into that
meeting to find God, and even less intention of visiting church anytime soon,
but that changed in a single instant. The only thought that I could even muster
was “I feel so at home here.” At that same moment, Dusty hugged my neck hard
and told me he loved me and said something so simple, yet so drastic. He told
me “welcome home.”
In the next following weeks, both at Church and at home, God
broke me down, and he did so in a very real and intense way! I finally had
reached a point where church and God weren’t just a routine, but a way of life.
Church and worship were no longer a burden or a waste of time, but a necessity
that I could barely go a single day without.
I began to pray and seek diligently, and God began to remind
me of a time I spent so many years trying to forget and avoid, and God renewed
my calling.
I have been called into the ministry in such a powerful way.
Not to just be a musician, or a preacher, or a teacher, but a father to my
generation. For years I viewed this calling as a hindrance and it scared me to
death to imagine myself giving up my life for something I was so unsure of. But
what a blessing to be called by the uncreated Most High God to help steward my
own generation back into his loving arms!
Just around six months after
surrendering my all to Jesus, he has made himself manifest in every aspect of
my life! I’m now blessed to be able to see and discern as he would have me to
do.
I now spend 40+ hours a week in
dedication, worship, and works of justice. Just to see the Lord speak to and
through me melts my heart and mind. It is overwhelming to know what true
obedience will bring us all through Jesus Christ; everlasting life with eternal
reign as Kings and Queens alongside Jesus himself.
I am now on staff at HOPE (House of
Prayer Evansville) and loving every moment of it! It can be exhausting to spend
so much time in prayer and seeking, but oh so worth it!
I know many that will read this
testimony will find it hard to believe or understand what and why the Lord is
working in me. (Especially those that have known me through my worst years!)
But that’s fine. “We will look foolish” and I’m quite good at making a fool out
of myself! So why not do it in the name of Jesus!? God has divinely opened my
heart in ways I never knew possible, and he has removed from me darkness that I
didn’t even know existed.
We have all had “hot and cold”
seasons, and I’m ending mine! The Lord has spoken and I have heard. He has
called me off the fence, and fully into his battlefield! I ask that each of you
that read this simply pray for me and my family as we go through this
transition. We took a large blind step of faith in giving our lives to the
Lord, and he has proven that every struggle will be absolutely worth it!
As we transition from Marketplace
jobs into full-time ministry, it is both our privilege and responsibility to
raise our own funds. This not only allows us to finance our ministry, but takes
the “buck burden” off of HOPE, so they can maintain their building and many
other ministries in the works.
In closing I ask that all of you
(who made it this far in reading) would pray for not only our family, but for
HOPE. We ALL have been called to be disciples, and what a wonderful blessing to
have an opportunity to minister and bless others FULL TIME, right here in the inner-areas
of our home city!
May the
blood of Christ cover and comfort all.
Adam, Jenifer,
and Levi Luttrull
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